2018 Top Nine
A personal goal for me this year was to share more photos of myself, the face behind Swell Design on social media. When I waited for my "Top Nine" Instagram posts to populate, this is not what I expected...
For the past 3-4 years, posting photos of myself is not something I enjoy. It makes me nervous, self-conscious and a lot of other feelings when I post photos of myself, but seeing this gave me a bit of a confidence boost. It is hard to admit, but it is difficult to come to terms that I am not the same size or weight that I was in college or high school. I know that life changes and my daily habits have changed. In high school I was running playing sports more often than not and in college, I was walking tons from class to class around my large campus and staying active. After college, you get a job. For me, that job is sitting at a computer for 8+ hours a day and even though it is a job I absolutely LOVE, it is still hard to comes to terms with the fact that while I run my business and do things (like write this post while sitting on the couch), that the odds of me getting back there is unlikely. I don't know why it bothers me so much because I know that I am still healthy and, more than anything else, I need to work on my mind. I hate hating my body and have had little peaks of moments where I learn to love myself. I have learned to shop for the body I HAVE and not the one I HAD. Which helps me feel better about myself too.
I have, for quite a while, been confident in my work, but not that confident in myself. My appearance, my non-design intelligence (cough, cough, math skills) and other things. I want to work on that this year. Another area to GROW in.
Thanks for following me here and supporting Swell Design this past year.
On to 2019!